Jason - Cooking

On the writing

I have to say this week was an interesting one.  I have never before written an infomercial.  I tried to channel my inner "Vince" the Shamwow/slap chop spokesman.  But I also tried to stick to the premise of cooking.  At that point the only thing I needed was something to cooking, something so foul sounding it would take an infomercial to have anyone try it.  After a little recipe hunting I knew I found my recipe:



http://allrecipes.com/recipe/14265/prune-whip/

Prune Whip

Hi, it's Jason with Prune Whip!

You’re going to be in a great mood all day, because you’re going be whipping your troubles away with the Prune Whip.

Now, look here’s a prune. One prune and you got a recipe for some unbundling, two prunes and your scale is going to love you. Look at this when you add a sugar and heat: the more it softens, the sweeter it gets. You don’t have to worry about any off putting taste.

Now, you love salad -- you hate chewing it. You know you hate chewing salads -- that’s why you don’t have any salad in your diet. Watch this one prune... better than salad! Whip it! No chewing.

You’re going to change your eating habits. Juice, Grapefruit, stuff to purge. No more! With Prune Whip, 5 seconds. 4 or 5 seconds, it's done.

This thing, this cheese looks obstructing. Stop having obstructing cheese, stop having an obstructing life. Eat this cheese putting it in, chewing it, like this. Now, you’re going to have a chaser, just like cocktail night, Prune Whip. Look at this you’re going to have an unobstructed life now.

Look here’s six egg whites. One whip, two whips, whip until frothy. Add that cream of tartar, that’s right we are going to stiffen this right up. And what you can do is fold these things together those warm sugary prunes and these whipped whites. Who doesn’t like a whipped white?

You’re going to love my whip. Watch this: a glass, a bowl. It’ll pour, but it can stand right up too. Comes with variety so you can do it however you like. Alright, or you can eat it in the Lazy Boy, wherever you like. So flexible, you can change the whole profile by baking it a little, the. Serving with whipped cream. Who would have thought, whipped prunes under some whipped cream, fantastic. Kids can do it, too. Kids want it! You know what they charge at the ice cream store? And what do you get, bloated and rotten teeth? Same ice cream dish, tastes basically the same, but better. Add a few nuts if you want. Stop throwing your money away. Stop throwing your health away. Enjoy the whip now and you will not only be satisfied, but you’ll be lighter in an hour. Who doesn't like that? More beautiful than ice cream.

"The reason you’re going to whip away everyday is cause it's so easy. One. Two, and the caterpillar becomes a butterfly. Now these other ones you see on food network. All the stores want to have this. You can’t beat it! Forget about it. Now take this Prune Whip, toss it back, and you feel it start to work. The magma is churning.

It's very quick -- it's a time saver all the way around.

Take it, it is like it washes, cleaning you completely. Good! To! Go!

It's easy, a bowl, a spoon, and whip.

Now here’s the deal when you buy the Prune Whip kit we’re going to give you the prunes. We're going to give you the sugar and the nuts. All of that in the container. But that is not all, the sponsors have added products, too. Charmin. What can I say? Don’t squeeze the Charmin, whip the prunes. Just bang it. Put it in the fridge, take it out when you need it. Pass it around the table. You’re going to love this thing. The whole family is going to love this thing. Kids, aunts, uncles. My grandma is a huge fan. Who doesn’t want to keep grandma happy? The Prune Whip kit sells for 19.95, but if you call now, within the next 20 minutes -- you know we can’t do this all day. You’re going to get a second kit absolutely free -- just pay processing. So that’s two for 19.95. now here’s how to order...